All 20 Premier League Club's 2020/21 Away Kits - Ranked

What's that? You want the away kits ranked too?

Oh.... you don't? Well tough, as we're doing it anyway.

Fresh from ranking (probably totally against your opinion) the 2020/21 home kits, we're making ageing midfielder moving into the central defender levels of natural progression by ranking all the away clobber the Premier League has to offer this season.

Some bad, some very bad, and some passable will feature. With the occasional #hardgarm thrown in for good measure.

In the word's of Sacha Baron Cohen's Erran Morad, 'yalla, let go'.

20. Burnley

Release your kit.

Sort it out.

19. West Brom

The eagle-eyed of you will have noticed that West Brom finished near the bottom of the home kit rankings, too.

That's because they're both awful.

Very, very awful.

18. Newcastle

Do you want to know what happens when a sponsor doesn't give a rat's backside?

Newcastle happens. Fans of the club can't even look forward to a decent kit, let alone multi-million pound, morally questionable, investments.

17. Wolves

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? STOP THIS RIGHT NOW.

GO TO YOUR ROOM AND THINK LONG AND HARD ABOUT WHAT YOU'VE DONE.

DON'T COME OUT UNTIL MY EYES HAVE RECOVERED.

STOP SMIRKING.

16. Fulham

This, Fulham, is a goalkeeper's kit. Try again.

15. West Ham

There is more creativity in Angelo Ogbonna's left earlobe than went into the creation of this kit.

Unless it's David Moyes' way of telling his side that he wants two banks of four next season. Could be that.

14. Southampton

You had a sash for the home kit! Sashes are good! Why did you ditch it for whatever the hell this is?

Shame.

13. Crystal Palace

Wilfried Zaha didn't feature for his annual Crystal Palace kit photoshoot because he might be leaving.

He didn't turn out because the ridiculous single red stripe down the middle is so painfully out of place he's decided to retire from football altogether.

12. Liverpool

The pattern is OK. The pattern is not, however, meant to be on a football shirt. Nor does it scream 'Liver bird'.

Inspired by hungover mornings staring into your friend's parents' swimming pool, perhaps.

Also, teal? Really? Shut up.

11. Chelsea

There is a joke to be made about Chelsea's kit looking like the metal grid that covers a sewage pipe and them (potentially) throwing money down the drain with their signings this season.

Can't think of it, though.

10. Leicester

Nothing overly wrong with Leicester's away clobber, but it does look like Jamie Vardy decided to get a 4AM upper arm tattoo while out for his friend's stag do in Zante.

9. Brighton

Yellow and blue work together. Brighton is a seaside town. Yellow and blue are bright colours you might find on the seaside. Makes sense.

But the collar does look like someone mistook Leandro Trossard for a game of horseshoes.

8. Tottenham

The pink lets it down. No need.

Still, could be worse. Much worse.

7. Manchester United

Shout out to Manchester United for taking the 'it looks like a bus seat' criticism in their stride and actually filming the promo stuff on a bus.

Needn't have bought a ticket either, Bruno Fernandes will foot the penalty.

6. Arsenal

Has, unsurprisingly, divided opinion. But it's different.

On one side, it encapsulates the essence of the famous Highbury marble halls. On the other hand, it looks like blood. Lots of blood.

More Miss Marple than marble. Still, it's pretty.

5. Aston Villa

Smart and inoffensive with enough detail to avoid it being too simple.

Pretty much a carbon copy from their home kit in different colours, but it's been pulled off here. Shame none of them look like they can breathe in it.

4. Everton

Hummel make great kits.

That is all.

3. Sheffield United

If that logo wasn't there, or was at least different.....

Nah, to hell with it. Going against the grain, the hideous logo will be ignored just this once since Sheffield United nailed the colour and design here. Real men wear pink. Even ginger ones with big ginger beards.

2. Leeds

Another pat on the back for Leeds who've got a solid set of kits to usher them into their first season back in the top flight for a heck of a long time.

With an ode to yesteryear, even if they come crashing back out of the top flight, they'll do so in style.

It's tough to get right, but green looks lovely when done well.

1. Manchester City

Who cares what the apparent 'inspiration' is. Who cares who made it. Who cares what it costs.

Every little detail is quite sublime. It really is a quite stunning piece of #garm.

Well done, Manchester City. Well done. Can't wait to see Lionel Messi